of God and churches

Believe it or not, God existed before Christianity was invented as a get-rich-quick scheme. Apparently, church goers are expected to donate some ten percent of their income along with their first born sons (daughters they're free to keep, though most do not). This can be a rather lucrative venture, especially since many Christians are blessed with the ability to turn trash into cash (like the talent hunt responsible for Britney Spears).

I've heard some people talk about setting up a church, hiring a minister and simply living off the donation, of which, I'm assured, there will be plenty. But just think: what would God think of them? And more important, will they provide free parking on weekdays? I asked God these difficult questions, and He told me to bet on black 29.