don't you dare threaten me

He: did u fix all ur problems?
I: I don't have problems
I: what you talkin' bout
He: fine
He: i will kill you.
I: where are you
He: i am outside your window
He: i have a chainsaw
He: and a laptop
He: with which i'm chatting to you
He: they're actually attached
He: it's pretty cool
He: i can control the chainsaw with my touchpad
He: too bad you won't live to see it
He: how dare you become idle
He: don't u realize i'm about to cut you into tiny pieces
He: using my touchpad
I: I WILL LICK YOU TO DEATH
He: how are you gonna give me a licking...
I: THE SAME WAY I GAVE YOUR MOM ONE
He: ...once i've CHAINSAWED YOU INTO THIN SLICES
I: ONE OF THOSE SLICES WILL BE MY TONGUE